Thursday, September 13

Welcome People Fleeing a Hurricane to Jacksonville

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If you are fleeing the devastation of a hurricane elsewhere in the South, welcome to Jacksonville, Florida. New Jax Witty would like to take this opportunity to give you some advice in order to help facilitate a pleasant stay in my new hometown. I was new to Jacksonville once myself, so I understand if you want to just hide at your hotel or family member's trailer home.

Evergreen Content About Jacksonville

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My yard started turning various shades of yellow, brown, and purple in the past month, and I'm trying to figure out which bug, mold, or weed killer went and started killing my lawn. I'm new to this St. Augustinegrass thing, but I know I don't want to have to re-sod like 10% of the poor folks in my neighborhood seem to do, so I'm going to try to make it green again. My HOA wants me to have a green lawn, and I do, too. A green lawn is a good metaphor for evergreen content on a website. It's content you want to look good whenever someone comes to visit, which means people will keep coming back.

Last 30 Days: All About Baxter AKA Bax to the Max

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Holy smokes,folks! The last 30 days on Bing search (I know, I know) has seen a lot of interest in my Baxter Troutman article. I wrote that one as kind of a lark, but I'll take the hits. Actually, most of what I write is a bit of a lark, so I guess it's what I expect. What's funny with the Baxter searches is the misspellings and people wanting to know what in the world his wife was talking about in another ad that I didn't cover.  Some kind of incident with getting smacked with a bed, I think. Actually, I just moved my beds around, and if Baxter is swinging beds at people, he's one strong rancher, farmer, and businessman. Wait, I just looked it up, and it was a bedspread, not a bed. That's the fluffy cloth thing that goes on top of a bed. Like a giant pillow.

Many searches seemed intrigued about the marriage, but this website didn't have any of the dirt they were looking for. I also did not answer some of the questions, like whether or not Baxter won (he did not). Or if his wife is hot. Or if anyone cheated. Or if he likes Trump or is pro-life. I really just watched an ad and made fun of it. See if you know the answers to the questions posed in the search queries below.

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Pennies From Heaven AKA Welfare for Writers

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