Saturday, September 2

Giant Pickup Trucks in Jacksonville

You've seen them. You might even own one. Giant pickup trucks. They are all over the place in Jacksonville, and I kind of wonder what the appeal might be. Actually, I saw one today and realized the appeal, since the guy who owned it was kind of a little fella, but the babe in the passenger seat was a real looker. I guess that's the point: if women in Jacksonville go for giant pickup trucks, then that's why there are so many around.

I can remember back in the early 90s seeing lots of guys with tattoos who seemed to be going out with girls that appeared to be out of their league. I actually considered getting a tattoo because I hoped hotties might dig me more. That didn't work out, partially because I had a college class with the total dork who sported the exact tattoo I had considered, and I realized HE was trying to be someone he wasn't in order to impress girls, which meant I didn't want to be that guy. Maybe he ended up getting lots of dates because of that tattoo.

Motorcycles are similar. My wife has told me that she thinks guys on motorcycles are hotter than those not on choppers. She doesn't know why, but that's what she thinks. However, I don't want to own one, and she doesn't want me to own one, so we have to just be happy with each other without the added cool factor giving me a boost. Besides, the transformation would be expensive for both of us, as we'd both have to dress the part.

My favorite is couples in matching Nascar jackets. I haven't seen too many jackets in Florida since I've moved here, but I assume there are some couples out there who own these. It's cheaper than a vehicle, anyhow. But it's the psychology of all of it that fascinates me. Do women like tattoos, motorcycles, pickups, and racing around in circles BEFORE they find a guy sporting the right gear? Do they like the idea of a guy who goes fast or is seen as a rebel? Or, do guys just like all that stuff and then girls pretend to like it for them?

I drive a little two-seat convertible. My wife could care less about it. In fact, I have never, in twenty years of ownership, been told by a woman that she liked my ride. But I really like it. Since I've moved to Jacksonville, three guys have taken photos of the car. One of those guys was driving an obnoxiously large SUV. He probably wanted the convertible. The teenager who lives a few houses away has one of those fast-sounding street-racer cars. More than likely, girls tell him he has a nice car. In fact, that's probably why he owns it.

Luckily, I don't have to worry about impressing girls, so I can own whatever car my mid-life crisis says is right for me. I also don't have to listen to my kids, so I've avoided the minivan. Here's the top vehicles as ranked by women in 2014 (
Women ranked these styles as cars that attractive men drive:
  • Pickup trucks: 32%
  • Sports cars: 27%
  • SUVs: 16%
  • Sedans: 11%
  • Hybrid or electric: 9%
  • UPS truck: 4%
  • Minivans: 2%
  • Mail truck: 1%

Sad that our own US Postal Service loses out to UPS, but you see what I mean about minivans. Apparently, black is the color and Ford is the make, too. Therefore, if you are a guy who needs a little boost when it comes to the ladies, I would recommend a black Ford pickup, but based on my observations so far in JAX, I think most of you already know this.

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