Saturday, December 29, 2018

Checking Off One More Year Without Sweetest Day

It was late October last year when I realized I'd missed Sweetest Day. This year, as the calendar turned to mid-October, I knew it would happen again. How could I possibly miss this important day once again? Well, it's partially because people in Kansas (last year) and Florida (this year) don't seem to know that there's a second Valentine's Day, roughly half a year after that holiday.


Ladies of Jacksonville, this is your chance to make it happen here. Sure, it's a holiday concocted by the candy industry, having started in Cleveland in the 1920s. Sure, your man would rather wash his pickup truck than have to celebrate his love for you in the form of trinkets. Sure, every guy who reads this will hate me for even suggesting it. But it's real, ladies.




Actually, I'm now finishing this article after my third year without Sweetest Day. The first year off didn't go so well when a friend from Wisconsin said he was doing a love song concert on Facebook Live and I sent him a message (from my wife's account) to keep it quiet because I was going to forget about the holiday. That put me in the dog house. I probably ended up getting flowers.

My first year in Jacksonville, I got away with it. Again, it's possible I picked up flowers from Trader Joe's around that time. This past year, or my third year away from Wisconsin, I don't think I even remembered when it was. My friend got married on Sweetest Day because it's such a big whatever in Wisconsin, but it's only taken three years to become pretty much meaningless in my relationship.

Actually, my love for my wife has not been ruined because I don't have to get an extra card and chocolates that she claims she won't eat before they disappear. In fact, I was always concerned that my wife put too much stock into what I bought her for Sweetest Day. It wasn't the thought that counts if her friend Ashley got dinner at a French restaurant and a new necklace. It felt like I could get away with the thought counting (like writing a poem) more easily for Valentine's Day or even our anniversary, with Sweetest Day being all about some item I was supposed to know she might want. Like warm slippers or a robe that makes her look like a linebacker.

My friend was actually lucky, choosing Sweetest Day as his anniversary. Two birds with one stone. I had three major love events per year. And I also got smacked around if I didn't remember something extra for my wife on St. Nick's (another mostly-Wisconsin holiday). So that meant I needed gifts for my wife that weren't going to disappoint her in February (V-Day), May (B-Day), June (A-Day), October (S-Day), and December (St. N Day). I feel that dropping two of these holidays as allowed me to focus more, but local Florida females may want to reverse that trend, especially when some bored housewives in their 50s realize they've missed out on Sweetest Day for three decades and St. Nick's for five decades. Maybe DeSanits's wife, as the new first lady of Florida, will fight for the rights of women in Florida to get more gifts from their men. Besides babies and scrub brushes.

Happy Sweetest Day - 3rd Saturday in October
October 20, 2018, October 19, 2019, October 17, 2020, October 16, 2021, October 15, 2022, October 21, 2023, October 19, 2024, October 18, 2025, October 17, 2026, October 16, 2027, October 21, 2028 Happy St. Nicholas Day - December 5/6 (He comes overnight)